Obedience

The past few weeks have been a whirlwind. Packing. Moving. Unpacking. Only to sort and repack.. Ha. I have been blessed with some very sweet time with family and friends along the way which is incredible. I am blown away by the awesomeness of God and how He has given me so many families and friends all around the world!!
In the middle of all of this, I've been trying to discern what God has for me this fall in Uganda. I had a sense for a while that watoto was not the organization that I was to be working with, but I was not sure where I was to go or what I was to be doing. As Daniel was getting ready to leave for Uganda I became very jealous of his enthusiasm. He was blessed to be able to go over and do a job he loves. I wanted the same for myself. I wanted to go over to Uganda to serve the Lord with the gifts I have been given and not just to be with him. (although I obviously want to spend time with him, I just feel that God has a ministry for me as well) About a week before Daniel left for Uganda I stumbled across a blog by an organization called serving his children. They had posted an urgent need for a physician. Very literally the second I read that my pulse quickened. I wondered if this was perhaps what God was calling me to. I emailed the director and received a reply within that day stating that it was very likely I was an answer to their prayers. In the days that followed I became more and more excited about this possibility. With the excitement came an ever increasing fear and doubt. This job would keep me far away from Daniel and make it virtually impossible for us to see one another. I would be working crazy hours with high-risk children and they would not all survive. Could I handle it? Could we handle it? Was this really what God is calling me/us to do? In the meantime, I searched out other options hoping for something closer and perhaps less demanding. Driven by fear, I made the decision to tell serving his children no and go with an organization in Kampala instead. Immediately after sending that email though, I had a very dramatic physical reaction... And felt very guilty about what I had done. It was as though I instantaneously knew I disobeyed God. That threw me into a tailspin and sent me to my knees, asking Him for forgiveness and direction. In the end, I knew I needed to be obedient regardless of the cost. God was just going to have to take care of all of the other details i was concerned about. The incredible thing is the grace that I received as a result. Serving his children was gracious enough to take me back and then also agreed to give me time off to spend with Daniel. I will get to see him weekly now instead of maybe once a month! That is so amazing!!! I can also get nearly free rent!!! I am so humbled by the blessings that God has rained down on my obedience. What a huge lesson learned! He knows all and will take care of everything if we trust him. I'm so blessed...